ART has converted an old grade school into an interactive theater experience: Macbeth as seen through the lens of a Hitchcock thriller.
Here’s some photos:
Running now through January 3rd. Mondays and Holidays are dark.
Let’s say you walk into a club, and the place is hopping. You’ve got just the right timing to grab some bar space and make that quick gesture to the tender, he responds with his face he’ll be right over, you reply with an expression that doesn’t want him to rush. Once you’ve got a frosty cocktail, shaken not stirred, and you’re slipping it down, you do a 180 and that classic move where you lean up against the bar, balancing with your elbows. You survey the scene.
And there she is, out on the dance floor. It appears she’s all alone, and twisting and contorting along with the thumping house beat like she was getting paid for it. She’s poetry in motion, a siren calling you out from a cliffside. She’s even made eye contact with you, and occasionally pursing her lips and batting her eyelashes. And you’re all “Me? Really?” You check to see if other men may be the target of this longdistance body language, but you’re not focused enough to tell. Maybe there are, maybe there ain’t.
Before your golden window is missed, you make a move and pounce. A B-line straight for her, but she’s dancing away from you, almost coyly. This excites you, but then you realize you’re not alone. A little over half a dozen other male suitors are on the prowl as well, and closing in fast. One elbows you not-so-accidentally in the ribs. Another trips his own best friend for a better chance to be near her. Your inner animal instincts flare to life over your psyche, the red mist of jealousy seeps in the corners of your eyes. This shit is getting real. You consider hurling your martini glass into your fellow man’s undeserving face. Welcome to the heat run, and you’ve got to step up your game in a serious way if you want the victory girl.
I’ve never been through this, and chances are you haven’t either, but we all know the competition, especially in the realm of courting a mate. Once the temperature and testosterone are on the rise, rationality and common sense fall to the wayside. Women are the leading cause of stabbing your best friend, or worse, a stranger, in the back. And it is no different in nature’s kingdom, particularly the kingdom of Animalia, Phylum of Mammalia, in the Order of Cetacea. For the first time, marine biologists have filmed the humpback whales’ incredible and titanic mating ritual.
I could foray and foment into my near-obsessive infatuation with the overwhelming love and respect I have for the species, but that’s unnecessary. Just watch these giants of the sea chasing some tail (pun totally intended) and maybe you’ll feel a little of the awe as well.
The humpback sow makes the bulls WORK for it, am I right? Talk about playing hard to get. Survival of the fittest be damned. And I thought there was somebody out there for everybody. I guess the unlucky bulls just got to find themselves a slower sow. Man. Have a happy Thanksgiving everybody.
I’ve acknowledged the fact I’m shaving on December 1st, and killing my friend. This has been a rough November, a bad November. I say this, and Thanksgiving is tomorrow/today, but no matter how great the event will be, it will not redeem this month. Roasted turkey, gravy smothered stuffing and mashed potatoes. Cranberry sauce. I’m the most thankful that the earlier Americans hung out with this land’s natives long enough to endorse this national holiday, before ruthlessly, and almost nonchalantly, murdering, stealing, and raping them. My mother makes the best green beans, she puts chopped almonds in with them, they’re to die for. I’d murder a complete stranger (over the Internet somewhere else, with an M1A1 Carbine, ofcourse) just to sit down to a full plate of runny, scrumptious, authentic French-Canadian poutine.
But the only person I’m killing on thanksgiving has been my constant companion all month long: my beard. It’s been a long and strong No Shave November, and it shows. I’m scruffy, ruffly, and no doubt fluffy. And throughout everything grey November threw at me, it stuck around. Instantly a discussion piece and a noble cause I could stand behind, steadfast and resilient. 500 other men stood beside me, throughout the New England area.
But it must go. It’s about to get much colder, and whiter, and harder. The time has come for wooling the windows, stoking the fire, and buckling down your bootstraps. Writing more, forgetting less. My radiator clangs and bangs to life, fighting with me against the dreadful winter to come. I have to buy khaki’s, or chino’s, I’m really not sure. The leisure and thrill of my bicycle must be sacrificed. Gloves, not mittens, and thick high-rising boots, my aunt works at Beans, she’s get a crazy discount.
You know November has come when you’re better off than you were September, but nowhere ready for the demon days of December. Hell, Christmas is going to sneak up on me this year, I just know it, but through career choices I might actually have presents for everybody, which will be a big step up from last year. Good evening, Potential, and see you tomorrow. And good job with the beards, guys.
1. The United States used to be so badass that we used the Nazi’s own postal service to deliver anti-Hitler propaganda with Operation Cornflakes.
Operation Cornflakes was a World War II Office of Strategic Services PSYOP mission in 1944 and 1945 which involved tricking the German postal service Deutsche Reichspost into inadvertently delivering anti-Nazi propaganda to German citizens through mail. The operation involved special planes that were instructed to airdrop bags of false, but properly addressed mail in the vicinity of bombed mail trains. When recovering the mail during clean-up of the wreck, the postal service would hopefully confuse the false mail for the real thing and deliver it to the various addresses.
2. Terrified that a waiter will/won’t take/leave your entree/salad? Learn the silent service code.
The silent service code is a way for a diner to “talk” to servers during a meal without saying a word, mainly to tell them that the diner is finished. This will prevent any embarrassing situations where the server would take a meal prematurely. To tell a server you are finished (only a cut of meat is ‘done’), place your napkin to the left of your plate, and place all your utensils together in a “4-o’clock” position on your plate. Utensils crossed on a plate signify that a diner is still eating. If you must leave during the meal, you should place the napkin on your chair to avoid any confusion.
3. If you speak English a ticking clock sounds like “tick tock.” If you speak Korean it sounds like “ddok-ddak ddok-ddak.” These are called “cross-linguistic onomatopoeias.”
Because of the nature of onomatopoeia, there are many cross-linguistic cognates of onomatopoetic sounds. The following is a list of some conventional examples: [including car horns, kissing, pigs, balloons bursting, and water dripping]
4. Thanksgiving is the perfect time to go over your knowledge of Norse mythology. Bone up on some Odin, peruse some Valhalla, and make sure you’re prepared for some Ragnarok.
Norse mythology has its roots in Proto-Norse Iron Age Scandinavian prehistory. It flourishes during the Viking Age and following the Christianization of Scandinavia during the High Middle Ages passed into Scandinavian folklore, some aspects surviving to the modern day. The mythology from the Romanticist Viking revival came to be an influence on modern literature and popular culture.
5. Sometimes it’s comforting to remember that the hedonic treadmill means we can never really be as happy as we want to be. Or maybe “comforting” isn’t the right word….
Brickman and Campbell coined the term “Hedonic Treadmill” in their essay “Hedonic Relativism and Planning the Good Society” (1971), which appeared in M.H. Apley, ed., Adaptation Level Theory: A Symposium, New York: Academic Press, 1971, pp 287–302. The theory has consequences for understanding happiness as both an individual and a societal goal. The concept was modified by Michael Eysenck, a British psychology researcher during the late nineties, to refer to the hedonic treadmill theory which compares the pursuit of happiness to a person on a treadmill, who has to keep working just to stay in the same place. Humans rapidly adapt to their current situation, becoming habituated to the good or the bad. We are more sensitive to our relative status: both that which we recently have and that which we perceive others to enjoy.
So we all know the J.M. Smucker Co. If you were a child in America between 1980-2000 and your parents didn’t feed you fois gras with beluga whale caviar* you most likely experienced the American institution that is the peanut butter and jelly sandwich, and the jelly on that sandwich most likely at some point was Smuckers.
Now through the wonders of Wikipedia I managed to stumble across the J.M. Smucker Co. page (Willard Scott -> McDonalds -> Ronald McDonald -> Willard Scott -> Smucker’s) and was struck by a list of slogans on the page. Apparently Smucker’s hires most of it’s marketing people from it’s target demographic, as some of the slogans sound like they’ve come from the mouth of a two year old.
Diana Fuller, head of advertising.
Here are some gems:
“With a name like Smucker’s, it has to be good!”
Okay Smucker’s, I grew up on this one. I don’t know why the Smucker’s name has to be good but perhaps there’s something I’m missing. Maybe “smuck” is the Igbo word for excellence. Maybe it’s all just lies.
“Smucker will make you pucker!”
A rhyme scheme! Good job. I have certainly puckered after jamming two spoonfuls of delicious raspberry jam in my mouth.
“Smucker Company, the brand you can trust”
You know when you were a kid and you tied your brother to a rock and left him in the woods overnight? And when your Mom called you in for dinner you blurted out “I DIDN’T TIE KEVIN TO A ROCK!” just to make sure your innocence in the matter was clear? Yeah. I kind of feel like this is something along these lines. Should I not trust other jams? Is Welch’s planning some sinister coup? Are they communists? IS THAT WHY ALL THEIR JAMS ARE RED?!?!
Trust no one but Smucker’s.
“There ain’t no place like Smucker’s!”
How does this sell jelly? This makes me want to travel. Is Smucker’s offering an extra three nights stay if I book a four day vacation?
“The only brand of jams that can make a piece of bread lively!”
I once left a slice of toast with jam on it out on the counter and then went on vacation for three weeks. When I got back I was confronted by the most lively piece of bread I have ever seen.
“Smucker’s may be yummy, your tummy may be too, but your grocer’s freezer, is not far from you!“
How can my tummy be yummy? Unless… wait… Smucker’s may be yummy, yes. My stomach, steeped as it is in high fructose corn syrup and strawberry chunks may be yummy as well, but only to cannibals… And what was that about a freezer? Not to far from me? As in not to far ahead in my future? Wait a second, jams don’t need to be frozen… The only thing that needs to be frozen are peas, corn, ice cream and… and…
And flesh…
Oh my God…
“Bread, jam and jelly, in your belly, lick your spoon and cut your bread, then you will be Smucker’s well fed”
Yes. Yes. I get it now… You think you’re clever, Smucker’s. You think you can hide in plain sight, flaunting it to everyone through your seemingly “innocent” ads but you’re fattening us. You’re fattening us on sweets. Fattening us until the time is right. When we’re to bloated with corn-syrup to move. Then you’ll strike. The pendulum will swing back and you’ll take each pound you’ve put into us with your precious jellies. But not me. I know the truth. I know that each one of you, down to the last canner on the last production line, each one of you are bloody cannibals… Cannibals that won’t stop until you’ve eaten us all…
There is no hope.
- Stay tuned for next month’s installment where I investigate the secret history of the Spirograph!
*Only really rich people know that Beluga whales have caviar. The idea that they are mammals and therefore don’t produce roe is a lie to keep the lower classes from rising up.
- The Ft. Hood gunman has awakened.
- Old Russian nukes power about 10% of our country.
- Maclaren pushchairs: like a tiny little guillotine on wheels for your child’s fingers.
- Three young US hikers, detained in Iran, are now being brought up on charges of spying.
- Obama presses Senate not to vote against Health Bill.
- I kind of sucks when your lovemaking is described by others as “murder” and “unnatural.”
- Israel’s siege claims another unwilling civilian casualty.
- 10 billion dollar loan? No problem if you’re China.
From the mind of Ritchie Wilson and some other cats comes…
No on 1, loses. Suddenly this initiative pops up for the 2010 ballot:
An Act to Remove Protections Based on Sexual Orientation from the Maine Human Rights Act, Eliminate Funding of Civil Rights Teams in Public Schools, Prohibit Adoptions by Unmarried Couples, Add a Definition of Marriage, and Declare Civil Unions Unlawful
I am furious. Spread the word.
- Vote today: No on 1, No on 4 and Yes on 5. (Maine residents only) Perhaps also vote for Kevin Donahuge? No other City Councilor has commented on Potential! so far.
- SonyEricsson debuts iPhone rival, meet the Android-based Xperia X10.
- Getting shot dead is probably not considered a work perk for ex-KGB spies.
- Bears: 1, Islamic millitants in the Kashmir region of Pakistan: 0.
- Iran planning on moving capital from modern Tehran to conservative city of Qom.
- Stuff to watch for in todays elections accross the nation. (Maine gets a shout out.)
- Luciano Anastasini saves homeless dogs and puts them in showbiz.
- Let’s all take a moment to consider Matt Damon.
While we’re on the quest for truths and a realization of our physical oneness with the universe, I’d like to throw out some clips from an article called Agnostic Christianity that my good friend the Rev. David Butler wrote for his church blog. Now I’ve mostly known David outside his occupation as a minister for the First Parish Congregational Church of Gorham, ME; however his views on religion are incredibly insightful and in step with my perceptions as well. So, I’m going to throw up some good excerpts in hopes that you’ll read the article and perhaps respond.
Here we go:
When preachers get into the pulpit and say that they are certain that God wants you to do one thing or another, they are either manipulating you with dishonesty or badly delusional themselves. To pretend that you know a thing that you cannot know is wrong on so many levels. To take the fruit of human imagination (either current imagination or centuries old imagination) and preach it, promote it, or legislate it as fact and or as the truth, is dangerous and oppressive. It narrows our minds and it creates a barrier preventing any future growth and discovery.
…
One of the central themes of the Hebrew Scripture is the proscription against idolatry. The early Israelites understood that the real threat to faith was not unbelief; it was worshipping things that were not worthy of worship. They knew the danger to genuine faith of treating relative things as if they were absolute. They knew that elevating human-made things to the level of sacredness was the one thing that would separate people from a real relationship with God. The very first commandment and the most vital was to “have no other gods before” Yahweh.
Theologian Paul Tillich defined faith as an “ultimate concern.” Everyone has something that has ultimate value to them whether it be God, money, family relationships, humankind, race, nation or some other. Faith is that relationship that we have with whatever it is that we consider truly transcendent. The danger is to have an ultimate concern for things that are not ultimate at all. That is what happens when the Bible is considered sacred in itself. Human beings wrote it. It is a human document. To consider it perfect or inerrant or directly created by God is to take something human-made and to elevate it to the status of God. Even within the bounds of the faith traditions of both Christians and Jews, this is idolatry and the worst kind of affront to genuine faith. We all know how scary it is when race or nation become people’s “ultimate concern,” because those sources of allegiance and identity tend to separate people and alienate one group from other groups. The elevation of one book or one doctrine within a religious tradition to “ultimate” status creates the same kinds of human divisions.
…
As Paul wrote so wisely (he was not so wise about many other things), “we have this truth in earthen vessels.” Those earthen vessels are us; our limited thoughts, feelings and understandings. If we believe that God is infinite, then by definition, God is beyond our comprehension. We cannot know or express anything substantial about what we cannot begin to understand. When we trumpet our “truths,” whether from what we’ve been taught or from what we’ve experienced, as the only truth or the truth for all, we are indeed delusional. We are taking the, oh so limited, contents of our own minds and hearts and inflating them into some universal things that they are not. That is an affront to reason, to the real search for truth, and an affront to the infinite nature of God.
And so, for religious people, and I am one, what we “know” is always a personal thing. We have experienced things that we insert into our own personal mythologies in a particular way. We may link those personal narratives with the broader narrative of a part of the Christian tradition, but when we think about the wider world we must always understand that our ideas are, not just limited, but provisional. Our constructs may be built on personal experience, but they remain just our own constructions that don’t even begin to grasp what we believe in as God.
Even the idea of God is a provisional one. What we have experienced when we refer to the experience of God is some tiny microcosm of what the idea of God might actually mean and we can’t quite grasp even that. We can speak only in stories and metaphors and vague language about realities that are completely beyond us. To assert that God, as we interpret God, exists or doesn’t exist is both beyond our ken and beside the point.
…
So perhaps the most faithful thing that we can be is agnostic. We look at the universe and into the human heart and sigh with the mystery of it. If it is the infinite we are after, any label, any concept, any thought, had better be provisional or it is just plain stupid. Thoughts of transcendence should open our minds, not shut them off. Ideas of an infinite God of love should connect us more deeply to other people who are different than ourselves, not erect more barriers. True experiences of the holy should leave us wondering at the mysteries, not trying to sell our little ideas to other vulnerable people.
Go read the rest of it here. Potential! will still be waiting for you when you get back.
